So just how unpopular are bankers at the moment, how do they stack up against other upstanding members of society? Picture this if you will, its 1975, the wall paper is horrible, collars are massive, the food is boring and your 12" TV is filled with the grinning face of Dave Lee Travis with an unfeasably large afro, thick bush-like beard, gold medallion, rose tinted sunglasses that are only slightly smaller than a side plate and a nylon beige suit that is 2 sizes too small for him.You've just spent the last 4 minutes in a semi-erotic Pan's people trance and now DLT gives you the top ten.
Queue the music....
In at number ten, they never turn up on time and often smell of shit it's the plumbers.
Down 2 places to 9 it's £250 an hour and more for each letter, it's the lawyers.
Up 1 place to number 8, they get 6 weeks off each summer and finish at 4, it's the teachers.
Going straight in at number 7, they'll hack your phone and pay the police, it's the journalists.
Staying put at 6, it's always twice what he quoted you this morning, it's the motor mechanics.
Up 3 place to 5 this week, one lady owner aren't they always, it's the 2nd hand car salesman.
At 4 a non-mover, they'll throw in the cat, but the carpet is extra, it's the estate agents.
Down 2 places,after 3 weeks on top of the charts, it's last weeks number 1, I don't care if your dog just died it's 3cm over the line, I'd rather eat a cow pat than be one, by the traffic warden.
Up a whooping 23 places, cash for questions and I don't keep receipts, it's your local MP.
And this week's number one, they've been unpopular for years, but this week saw them top the pile. The latest track from their mutli-platinum album "Piss off we're too important to fail" put your hands together for those filthy bankers and "Where's all your money gone"
Although we all want someone to blame for the current crisis and the obvious culprits seem to be the bankers or the whole banking system in general, is it really their fault? I'm sure they have to take their portion of the blame for which a swift kickings or rather heafty whack in the plums would seem a most satisfying punishment, but did they engineer this catastrophy or did we all get sucked into believing we could have our cake, eat it and then sell the plate on ebay for twice what the cake cost? If it looks like a dog, smells like a dog and barks like a dog then surely it can't be a 2 week holiday in Florida with 10 days admission to Disney World thrown in. Are we really saying that we weren't in on this as well, but prefered to hitch a ride on the gravy train, next stop new BMW central.
We have to take resonsibilty for our own actions. We ran up credit bills we coudn't pay back, took out mortgages for more than we could afford just because some idiot in a suit said it would be okay and we really thought a new car every year and a 2 week holiday in the sun was our god given right. Just because the bank said we could have an overdraft doesn't mean we have to use it, it's not our money and the interest paid back is just wasted money. We went into a shop saw a coat at half price, whipped out the plastic, but when we finally cleared it off our credit card we find we could have bought a sofa instead for the same money. A credit card limit is the most you can spend not a monthly retail challenge played out in Next and John Lewis. Holy crap, REALLY!!
So where are we now? Basically we've had the fun and now we have pay back time. We've spent all our money for this year plus next years money as well. It's like the morning after the best party ever, we've just woken up and can't remember why someone has written cat flap on our forehead in permanent marker. We've got a stinking head ache, a mouth dryer than a camel's knee cap and we've just remembered we're off to a kids party in 15 minutes. It's going to be painful and we're going to get zero sympathy because it was self-inflicted. Time to man up.
No comments:
Post a Comment